Arms Fully Open

Clocks' ticking slowly,
With minutes floating away.
Minutes to hours. Hours to days.
Day after day,
I hope and I pray,
For this moment to stay.
Stay now. Stay forever.
Stay constant this way.

A beautiful lady
I have right beside me.
Grasping hands so softly.
Perfect life, living calmly.
I step to the future.
Her step comes to follow.
The clock keeps on ticking-
A better tomorrow.
A sky comes to hover.
She falls from above.
With arms fully open,
I catch my true love.

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Breaks Me

I walk through these halls, I take note of it all.
I notice the tans, the fads and even those designer bags.
I hear the names being called, I notice the lies.
I feel the heavy atmosphere full of rumors and hidden lives.

I sit in the corner, the last desk of the row.
like a black and white picture fading away.
the point, the stare, their laughter fills the air.
no sleeves to hide what I've done, only a painted veil.

I remember that night, the night they all laugh about.
if only they were there, if only they knew, what this game could do to you.

the screams were loud, my door was locked, the bruise was bold.
the steel was cold, my skin was warm, the room was dark, my tears were not shown.
I fell to my knees, I looked to the sky, I at least tried to cry.
the crimson river was like a rush, and then I saw the ocean that flowed.
I cut too deep, but I didn't care. anything to not be here.
I felt like air, I fell to the ground, and then I couldn't hear a sound.

I next woke up in a hospital bed, my mother was crying.
my father beside me. they told me they loved me, they kissed and hugged me.
they showed me the loved me, they actually care.
and they took me away from there, to Pennsylvania.

a few years later, I sit here, writing this poem, remembering that year.
I'm different now, I have many friends, I have a true love, I have my own life.
sadness is gone, the anger has vanished, and now I no longer cut for satisfaction.
I beat the addiction, I feel so much stronger.
but I keep these scars as a reminder.
what breaks me, makes me.

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A Place Where No One Likes To Be

There's a place where no one likes to be
So they save that little place for me
They shove me in and lock the door
They call me a dick, an ass, a man whore
They say shut up, they say fuck you
But none of them know what I'm going through
I've lost good friends. I've been a lost friend too
I've said I'll never love, and I've said I love you
Deep down I know I deserve all the bad
I just miss the life that I once had
I miss my family, I miss my friends
I'm part of a nightmare that never ends
People leave, and people die
But the nightmare continues when I open my eyes
Everything feels like it's falling apart
I've broken my family, my faith, and my heart
Every time I think life can't get worse
I watch another friend ride off in a hearse
I don't remember how to smile, or even have fun
It's true when they say only the good die young

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